Archive for April, 2010

Loyalty and Royalty

Ana Mae Coxxx's Command Performance

The last couple of days have been a whirlwind!  I performed for one of my dear friend’s birthday on Thursday night and enjoyed a night with Haus members.  Friday night I spent with Cowboys and Cowgirls in support of the Gay Rodeo……and then it all came to a crazy wild day yesterday!

Last night I had the honor of performing a command performance for their Imperial Majesties Renita Valdez and Stephen Dorsey at the 2010 investiture.  Imperial events are always a very interesting time.  Some of the people that attend these functions have been on the scene for over 40 years…..you really get to see what it will be like if you stay involved your entire life!  What an inspiration!  Besides my performance I was thrilled to see 4 of my haus members be added to the Court for the year – and they even named me the “Madam of the Haus of Coxxx” in their court!

After my performance I ran off to my weekly show at Marlena’s.  It was last night while getting ready for an energetic performance of Tina Turner’s Proud Mary that I was flooded with emotion.  The Haus is very loyal to me in an ways – however two people in my world stand above and beyond the call of duty.

Alan and Moses

Alan, my best friend, and his partner, Moses have been there with me from the beginning!  They are at nearly every performance, event and fundraiser – right by my side making sure that I don’t need anything.  They zip me in to clothes, they carry my bags, fix my hair…..literally anything I need…..but most of all – they are very LOYAL friends!  They have now found themselves wrapped in a world of drag queens, crowns and events……I love them!

I wish everyone could have people in their lives like these two!  I am lucky that I have a “family” that is there for me whenever I need them.  I hope YOU have people in your life that act the same for you!

Always remember – be there for eachother – you never know when someone needs you most!

Also thank you to Chris, Alotta, JP, Anya, Emma and Gary for being there with me last night – it meant the world to me!

Also thank you to Chris, Alotta, JP, Anya, Emma and Gary for being there with me last night – it meant the world to me

Being Grounded

One of the members of the Haus – my wonderful “Sweet” Coxxx – gave me a card a few weeks ago when I was having a tough time and I decided to share what it said with all of you.  This poem is fantastic and is just what some people in my life need to remember right now.

A mighty wind blew night and day.

It stole the oak tree’s leaves away,

Then snapped its boughs and pulled its bark

Until the oak was tired and stark.

But still the oak tree held its ground

While other trees fell all around.

The weary wind gave up and spoke,

“How can you still be standing, Oak?”

The oak tree said, ” I know that you

Can break each branch of mine in two,

Carry every leaf away,

Shake my limbs, and make me sway.

But I have roots stretched in the earth,

Growing stronger since my birth.

You’ll never touch them, for you see,

They are the deepest part of me.

Until today, I wasn’t sure

Of just how much I could endure.

But now I’ve found, with thanks to you,

I’m stronger then I ever knew.”

Let’s all remember that we are stronger then even we even can understand.  We are grounded and can endure anything this life gives to us.  I never personally think I am grounded, but I do have moments – if only for a moment where I realize that I am – and what a fantastic feeling that is!

I hope this touches someones heart as much as it touched mine!

Thank you my “Sweet” angel!

Randomness from the little people in my head

As I sit here and think about the events of the last few days my mind spins.  There is so much I want to talk about but how it all fits together only the little people that live in my head can explain.  SO bear with me as this little post will likely be very disjointed and make little to no sense as a whole but there are a few little lessons to be learned…….

Ana Mae Coxxx

Sunday was an adventure!  I had the opportunity to hang out with my drag daughter and two of the other members of the Haus of Coxxx before I had to run to a fundraiser to support more friends.  One of the other members of the Haus is a guy I actually dated briefly and after a blow up a few weeks ago we have not talked much but have been in contact and been friendly when in social settings.  The best part of my Sunday was when he and I took a minute and looked at each other and said “It is over! – No more fighting!”  This was such a relief to me as he is very special to me and it would have killed me to lose his friendship.  He is an amazing person and I know that we will always be there for each other.  This event in my life actually proved to me once again that love has many forms…..sometimes you just have to see it in a different way.

Then it was off to the Royal Bunny Contest to benefit the Night Ministry in SF and the Ducal Council.  I attend Ducal events for a number of reasons.  First off to show my support for such a powerful organization and also because a dear freind of mine, Pollo del Mar, is the reigning Grand Duchess.  On top of that my “niece” Max A Million was one of the contestants to be named Miss Royal Bunny.  I had a blast seeing everyone and then got to hang out and bar hop with my dear friend Emma Peele.

Myself with Former Emperor Paul Poole and Grand Duchess Pollo del Mar

Then yesterday was a day all in it’s own.  I had a very long frustrating day at work that ended with a relaxing massage and some quality time with my best friend.   Mixed in though I booked 3 more appearences for this month – now amounting to a crazy 17 – which is a lot when you work between 40 and 50 hours a week too.  I realized that time is valuable……..sometimes I don’t feel like I have any (which maybe I don’t)  but I am living life, every day, to the maximum.  I am building this name of mine so I can make a difference.  And I am glad that you – the reader of this – are here to support me.

Live…….. Love……. Expand……..Dream!

It is ok to Remember….

Well last night was a GREAT night!!  The Haus of Coxxx was in full force last night.  It very well could have been the most in one room ever!  (except for possibly my birthday show)

The evening started with a stop off at my daughter’s (Alotta Coxxx)  house to help her put the finishing touches on her look for the evening.  While there I realized I had forgotten some key components of my make up and my roomate – the ever fabulous Master of what I do – drove the 30 minutes all the way back home to get it for me!  Then it was off to the Castro where I attended my normal pre-show bars, but this time it was different – it was the first time I had my daughter with me!  She looked AMAZING – and people noticed!

Some members of my family with their friends!

Then it was off to the show with 6 other members of the Haus in tow – when we got to the show even more showed up…….now to the point……Due to an emotional week (and month) for many members of my family, including myself, I decided to pull out a song that I only do on special occasions…..mainly because it is over 7 minutes long!  I perform It’s All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dione like no other.  It was a truly emotional experience.  Every time I do that song I FEEL every single word!  Last night was exceptional – I looked out in to the crowd and noticed – these people are feeling it with me!  By the time I got to the second chorus they were singing along.  There is no better experience for me as a performer then to know I broke through!  I made them feel something.

The long and the short of this little rambling is that I think it is good to remember things.  I think it is a good thing to let it all come back to you – to remember that touch, that kiss, that feeling that that person made you feel.  Even when a relationship is over we have to look back and remember the good times and remember that there was love – and often times there still is!  Through the heartache and through the pain there still can be love!

Below is Celine’s video of the song – I urge everyone to remember that feeling!

Who are you calling a fruit?!?

We, as people, are like trees.

The Roots – we have the things that made us who we are the foundation of our being.  The parts of us that support who and what we become.  This often comes from our up-bringing or people in our lives that “feed” us those things that form us and mold us in to who we are – however the roots don’t define us.

The Trunk – our trunk is our strength.  Just like a tree we start with very little strength and as we get older that core becomes bigger and stronger and and support anything!  We also every now and then have to shed a little bark off of that core so we can let people in to our lives.

The Branches – our branches are the way we effect the world we live in.  They are the extensions of our strength.  Branches can some times pop out of no where and surprise us that we had the strength to grow that little bit more.

Our Leaves – our leaves is what makes us beautiful and each of us unique.  They are our “flare”  yes some of us are evergreens and some have to shed their leaves once a year but….we all have them and we all are beautiful in our own way.

Now some of us even have fruit!!!  I am one of those people!  When you have fruit you have the opportunity to give back to the world in a way that may help someone else to grow.  We just have to make sure that OUR fruit is sincere and cared for before it is picked off of your branch.

I PERSONALLY try every day to produce the best fruit I can, because I love encouraging people to grow.  Yes, true, sometimes I give someone an apple with a worm in it or that has some bruises, but it was still created with love!

The First Time May hurt!

Well here I am!  How insane!  I never thought in a million years that I would start writing a blog……However the time has come!  I see and hear so many things in my every day life that I just can’t help but share them with SOMEONE……and maybe someone will actually read my ramblings here.

Well I guess I should tell you a little bit about myself.  Most people would consider me a “drag queen” as I do on a regular basis.  However, I feel that performer sums it up better.  I have been performing in this capacity for the last 10 years, however have been on stage since I was 7.  The backing for everything I do is emotion.  My goal in each performance is to convey the emotion behind the song, not just go on stage and move my lips to the singers words.  This usually proves very emotional, not only for myself but for the people in the audience.  But it is what makes me who I am!

Me

I am also the founder and “Mama” of the Haus of Coxxx.  The haus is a group of people who support me and I support them.  We are more a family then anything else.  We play like a family and we certainly fight like one too, but at the end of the day we know someone has your back!

Well in my first post I won’t ramble too much.  I live in the wonderful city of San Francisco and perform weekly at Marlena’s Bar in Hayes Valley.

Wow that was my first time – and it only hurt a little!